In business we are taught how to communicate with our clients and prospective clients in order to gain rapport. This is called effective inter-personal communication. Without it you can't expect to have a positive, healthy, long-term relationship with the people that are the foundation and lifeblood of your business. There is also another form of communication; it's how we communicate with ourselves. This form of communication is called Intra-personal communication, and chances are it's something you were never taught. It has to do with our emotions as well as what we say to ourselves. It too is also very important to a positive, healthy, long-term relationship, but with yourself, and maybe even more important than Inter-personal communication. Intra-personal communication is a skill that can be learned.
Inside of each and every one of us we are carrying around a history of words from the time we were born. Now you may say, "yes Mark, I know that because I use most of those words today". Okay, I'm not being that simplistic, but then again, I guess I am. Even though you may know the same words as the next person, give or take a few, the words you know were more than likely put together in a very different way than that next person.
Words Can Really Hurt
I worked with a young man whose father called him stupid most of his childhood, among other things negative that were communicated to him. During our sessions we came to an understanding that his father meant well. Meant well, you say? How could someone being called stupid have a positive intention? I'm sure you've heard of reverse psychology? As it turned out, his father was hoping that by calling him stupid he would do the opposite. In other words, by calling him stupid he hoped his son would do the opposite and learn to be smart.
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